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Dha Daily Does & Donts Of Squiglez (mon-fri, itz dha same ole thang)

13 May

today is friday

wake at 9am

gotta get in dha shower so i smell fresh in 5

out the shower and hungry around 9:30

watching pplz leave for school, i get my hair done around 9:45

go outside in the robe to feel the weather n get some air around 10

get dress according to weather at 10:05

out the door at 10:15

checking the muni around 10:18

on the bus before 10:30 = squiglez will be on time to wurk ūüôā YaY!

on the bus after 10:30= squiglez is goin to be late as usual -____- goshdarnit……

get to work sometime between 11 – 11:15

meet with lyric’s youth advocate till 12

gotta talk to the bosslady at 12

work on the timesheet and finish filling it out around 2

leave lyric, and go……..

i could go home but itz boring there :/

i can go downtown, but theres nothing to do but to windowshop… boooo :O

where o where could i go……….

suddenly……. it pops in my head like the sun poppin outta the cloudz

DOLORES PARK A>K>A> D.P!!!!!!

squiglez getz dha juicebox smile :D!!!!!!

calls some friends to se if there down

to chill at D.P. where the sun always shines A>K>A> the beach

walking…..

walking…….

walking……..

at 18th n church by 1:45

walking up the hill towards the beach

i see the regulars, which i classify as the D.P. kids

we chill for a good 2 hours

at D.P. we hav the kumbaya circle

we sit talk n chill out

this concludes the day of squiglez, if u wuld lyk to knw the evening edition find my blog n ask for it……. :D!!! juicebox smilez!

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my myth of distrust, A.K.A. why i knt neva trust anybody

11 Apr

to trust u is to give my heart to u to hold.

errytyme you lie to me u hurt my heart

sumtymes i wonder if u thynk dhat im stupyd

by lying to me

im gulliable bt nt dhat much

i kan trust u holding my things bt i kant trust u wit my money

i kan tell pplz apart

im very observant of behavior

dnt get butt hurt doe kuz honestly

if u lie or steal frm sombody

den imma thynk before i do stuff wit u

bt if ur by my side

ryde or die

n u give me things lykk  i give u

den i kan trust that u wnt cheat me

stab me in the back

i run away frm he said she said

sumtymes my wall goes up

wen a gurl tries to talk to me

sumtymes

the game is full wit soo much swagg

that i fall in too easy

sumtymes my friends complain

they get butt hurt wen i wnt tell them certain thangs

i hav to protect my information

my sanity, my life, and things i got

i am very territorial bout my stuff

i feel sumtymes that pplz r out to get meh

the only times that i dnt be feelin diz way is wen im at a home

nt my home. i feel very unsafe dere

distrust has run my lyfe for many years

its my best protection

frm getttin eaten n spitted out

in diz world dog eat dog type of mess

only the strongest n dha smartest survive

diz mindset hasnt droven me crazy

bt it droven my mother nut nut

paranoia- its nt a problem

grimey, scandalous, throwing under the bus, selfish atitude- thats the problem

its an epidemic

that starts the mind of distrust.

jump inside your love….. with sequins

28 Mar

“We are persons of quality, I assure you, and women of fashion, and come to see and to be seen.”- Ben Johnson

yesterday, i went with lyric and larkin youth to see brittney spears, and her first performance she was dressed in a fierce sequiney one piece leotard. im starting to adore leotards, mainly because they make me look good when i put one on. i like it when i see specially made one with sequins and lights (brittney had a red lighted leotard for her third song).

i love big hair. i thing that the higher the hair, the seriously your tooken. i like wearing curly hair because i feel like people find me beautiful. its kind of wierd when i wear straight hair because then people feel like artificial for me¬† to straighten it. i like when the drag queens wear hairspray made wigs that touch ceilings, with sickening side swoops, and it goes down to your butt. its shows the emphasis on your drag. makeup is really important in drags and fashion. your eitha looking for a clear clean cut look or your doin sickening fierce drags with some powder…!

even though i struggle in heels, i do envy a woman who knows how to handle her heels. it comes natural to sway your hips and walk tall then dragging your feet or stumbling like your fresh out of a club in castro at 1 in the morning. i feel that if your walk is right then you can handle the high heels and stilletto. but, if your like me and you kant handle the heel, i choose wedgies and short but cute heels, not the heel your grandmother rocks.

Friendships In School

21 Mar

When i was in elementary school, friends were always hard to come up on. this really shifted my way of thinking at an early age because i always played by myself, and hand wondered if because im by myself if i was wierd or was i not important. i also hit puberty at an early age, so i always looked like i was older then i really was. i felt like a sourthumb graduating, bacuase i looked older and because i was the only tanned one walking the stage.

 

In middle school, i started to hang outside in my community, and this often led to me staying out late with the bad crew doing bad things. i was always taken advantage of and made to look like im the weak sauce of the group. i never went to school in 6th grade because i was in a gang and i often fought with people at school. i never really was accepted at this school, so i sat in the cafeteria and eat n hangout when i didnt have class. i once got into a fight with some girl because her boyfriend liked me and nobody helped me, or backed me up like my gangmates did. in the 7th grade i finally hung around people at school, and for a little bit there was no drama. then rumors started passing around and again i was the target for drama and violence. this girl one said “u have to pay me to speak to her”. i never understood why i felt accepted with these girls, but that year we started the posse, and she still never tuned up or sang with me. my grandmother died while i was in 7th grade, and i went crazy for a year about what im living for on this earth

in the 8th grade, i kicked it around mainly guys, because i decided that female friends were too much, and also because this girl who was trying to be my friend stabbed me in the back. i used to be in the “white washed” group, bacause the girl lived the valley girl dream. i felt accepted because one of the girls was from nigeria, but she had rejected her culture and me. so me and this one girl gotten kicked out of the group for drama the other minions started, and we had to finish by my homegurl fighting my other homegurl. it was crazy cause i was torn apart. they harrassed her, so i stayed neutral and remain good friends with all on them.¬† i had also hung around this boy because he was new to and people thought that he was acting “too black to be asian”.i started to go to the music class and gotten in to the groove of the kids there. i graduated with people screaming my name and more confidence about what i should be doing in life. i was living with my mother that year, and i hated her because she had no sese in friend unless she was using them for what she needs. i started to run away to my childhood friend who imma tell u about inna little. after running away, i decided that i was going to dedicate my life to gettin to knw as many people as i could

in high school, i didnt get many friends, but my list of enemies grew. i had boyfriends that i dont talk to anymore. my cousin and my childhood friend, helped me through the first 2 year of high school. my childhood friend was the only one in my gang who still talk to me. i knw her since i was 10, and she still holds me down. ever since i started to work at lyric i improved my communication skills, and now i have a network of people. a whole family of people from lyric and other non profits and from castro. im nw a castro kid and its fun. i feel accepted n comfortable around all these people because they keep it real and help me instead of abuse or harrass me as a friend. this is my spoof on friendship……

MUSIQUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

8 Mar

Musique, is a form of life and a form of expression. Musique is innovative, because of the way it can take a community by storm….. Musique is like a way to speak to dha community…..

Musique can also sell a story or a product or a dream….. Musique runs my life and keeps me balanced…

So now ask yourself, what had Musique done for you in your life…….? Be thoughtful and honest with yourself….

Maybe Musique connects to your soul n makes it happy, maybe it tells and writes the stories of your life, or maybe its the sweet sound that you like to hear when your playing it…… Everybodys reason for loving Musique is different from person to person….

Musiqe in the queer community bring pplsz together in many ways…. Yes there is Vouging involved, but its not only that. Some of the Musique i listen to that are from queer artist often show me a different world than im used to….. so the next question that i ask is what does Musique open your eyes too?

M.E.E.T (Men Educating and Empowering Together)

23 Jan

Hello, Everyone this is M.E.E.T’s first blog post, At M.E.E.T we¬†go deep¬†into issues in the community such as, Body image, Male Priveledge, Sex& health, Allyship,etc and many more.¬†We also¬†know how to have a good time which leads us to¬†talk about the Drag show which is¬†going to happen¬†on 1/29/11 Yes thats right! January 29th¬† 2011 DARLING! bring your dragz and come enjoy the show do you and take it to a 10, The Important thing is that this is not a competition its all for fun and community building lets Ki-ki and have some fun Hunties…¬†¬†M.E.E.T is where it is at this month!

M.E.E.T is FREE and open to all male-identified folks and allies* 24 & under. Allies are any body committed to supporting their local queer boy community Fridays from 4-6pm